When I am teaching social media for the real estate industry I often say social media is about “building relationships.” That concept might be obtuse to some. There are founding measures that occur first, which allow a relationship to develop and a community to build. The question is, are you really establishing a relationship, or are you building affinity, fondness, or friendship? I think we may be putting the cart before the horse too often.
What is a Connection?
Merriam Webster defines connected as:
1 : joined or linked together
4 : having social, professional, or commercial relationships (e.g. a well-connected lawyer)
5 of a set : having the property that any two of its points can be joined by a line completely contained in the set; also : incapable of being separated into two or more closed disjoint subsets.
A connection is defined for the purpose of this article as:
a person connected with another especially by common interest.Life is about making connections and building true relationships with people we share common interests with. Social media is more about making connections, connecting people, and expanding upon those to grow larger networks, permitting more connections to be made, and not necessarily establishing deep relationships. Eventually those connections grow into relationships and communities can develop. That is why I say – cart before the horse. You cannot build a relationship without first establishing a connection.
Connections in Real Estate
Understanding those basic principles is also extremely important for us as real estate professionals. Often as we sit at an open house, waiting for the next consumer to walk through the door, we are thinking of how we will connect with them. I often coach real estate agents on how to recognize and make those connections. Some are far too hungry to connect with so many people that they miss the opportunities for a quality connection.
I advise agents to try to find a substantial connection with at least one or two people per open house. You cannot come off desperate, pushing or overly enthusiastic. People can sense fear or desperation; they don’t want the hard sell. They want service and considerations. Too often agents aren’t thinking about this as they try to collect another name on their list. I see this same thing happen at relocation events. Some agents are so busy running around the room collecting names that they are not offering the quality and care that the consumer is seeking.
You Talk Too Much
Real estate agents talk too much, it is that simple. Stop talking and start listening, the things you will hear from the consumer will be the things that help you make that conversion to client. As the saying goes, you have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Don’t just listen, but really hear what you are being told – ask questions, seek further clarification, take notes, and repeat back important points. These are the things that will set you apart from another agent and turn that connection into a relationship with the client.
And never forget the “ask”. If you don’t ask for their business you won’t get it. Be certain to tell someone that you would like to work with them, if you genuinely would. Also never forget that you can’t be all things to all people, recognize when you aren’t connecting and acknowledge and accept that. I actually tell my clients that if at any time they don’t feel comfortable working with me, to please tell me. I then refer them to someone I think might better suit them. I will also refer clients out that I don’t feel I can work with.
If you are genuine, thoughtful and show compassion you will always end up with great connections and great clients.
Maya J. Paveza is a full-time Mom, REALTOR, Social Media Maniac, author of mayaREguru.com and more. Her current projects include: Curator for the Social Media section for Real Estate and Women: RAW, a series of classes she designed, writing a book, and a soon to launch real estate social media community and education site she is creating with Chris Brogan and his company Human Business Works. Maya often says: “Give your time, wisdom, experience to someone else and you will never regret it.”
